Throughout my life, I’ve become very aware of the damage that has been done to me. I’ve often heard the phrase: Hurt people — hurt people. This turn of phrase encapsulates a very deep choice each of us to a greater or lesser extent must participate in. I’m sure there are some people out there who have an idyllic childhood and life, I’ve never gotten to know any of them. I mention all of this because I believe each of us navigates our future relationships with the scars or the unresolved pain of these unhealthy experiences. Those who confront, inventory and resolve the trauma are still left to cope with training and learning new ways that were never demonstrated or imparted during their youth. Those who ignore, deny, and pretend that the damage wasn’t bad or worse than others are destined to either being a new supplier of pain and damage or a target for accepting this pain from another. Both unhealthy, both unacceptable for the long term health or growth of a person. I have a personal experience for a range of these states. I’ve been the denier and the target. I have had two suppliers in my life one by birth and one by marriage and I’m happy to report that I’ve done enough work that I have never been a supplier and I’ve stopped being a denier and kicked both of my suppliers to the curb.